Friday, June 3, 2011

Worry Wart

I am a worry wart. I come by it honestly. Most of the ladies in my family are worriers. It's only natural being a mom, a wife, a teacher, a friend, a everything to everyone.

Being a worrier means that I project everything into a worst case scenario. I know it's a defense mechanism for me. If I worry about things and come up with the worst things that can happen, I can either prevent them from happening or I can make myself emotionally unattached to whatever it is I am worried about. Worrying is tiring and I am tired of worrying.

So I am working on letting go....letting go and like the old saying goes, letting God. He's bigger than my problem. He's already been in my tomorrow. Nothing that happens to me in life is out of His control. He will only let a situation get so big and go on for so long...He is the boundary. He holds the whole world in the palm of His hands and He holds me. How I love Him so.

Be Blessed,

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

A love affair is a wondrous thing????

Yes, I admit it. I am having an affair. This affair has gone on for most of my life.

This affair is like many others. We love each other, we hate each other. We get together, we break up and separate from one another. Time goes by and we realize we cannot stay apart from each other for very long and then we are back at square one and back into a relationship that only brings pain.

Many women have this kind of affair but we all have them differently. Some women hide this affair and only act on this affair after the family is asleep or when the kids are away at school. Some women are bold and are not afraid to show their love for this thing but then they make themselves violently ill later and regret their rendevous with this illicit lover. Some women stay as far away from this temptation and then end up destroying their body, mind, and soul.

I am ready to reveal this wooer's identity today....I have an insane love affair with food.

When I wake up, I think about what I am going to eat. When I am eating, I think about what my next meal will be. When I go to bed at night, I am thinking about where I will stop at for breakfast the next morning. I never have a moments rest from this affair.

Food makes me happy. I get excited about trying new recipes. I get excited about going to new restaurants and trying new foods. When I want to celebrate something, I go out to eat. When I plan a family night out, I plan it around where we are going to eat.

Food is all encompassing for me and I am tired. I am tired of fighting this affair but I am tired of giving in to it. I am tired of feeling this way and looking this way because like a new lover, I have let this affair take on a life of its own and it is consuming me. I am addicted to this lover and I want the affair to stop. I just don't know how to tell it no.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Thankful Thursday...The view from here

This was my view a few nights ago. Buddy is a typical three year old boy that goes and goes and goes until he finally passes out. Normally he will pass out on the couch or on the floor. On Christmas day he passed out with his feet on the floor and his chest on the couch.

But not on this night.

On this night, my Buddy climbed up into his mamas arms

layed his head on my chest

and fell fast asleep.

I am so thankful that every once in a while, I get these quiet moments with him.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Happy New Year

Happy New Year Y'all!

If you are my friend on Facebook, you know that the day after Thanksgiving, I decided to start a 33 day challenge to post daily something I was thankful for. This idea came to me when I begin to question why we only have one day designated to being thankful. There is so much in the world that I know I personally have to be thankful to God for so why couldnt I continue this season of thankfulness? I decided to challenge myself to every day until the beginning of the new year, to find one thing to be thankful for. Sometimes it was very easy. On the day I had to get up early for work, I was thankful to actually have a job to get up and go to. One day I was thankful for such a simple thing as being able to enjoy a yummy slice of pizza at Grimaldis. Some days I thanked God for my kids and my family. One day recently was particularly hard and on that day I was just simply thankful for being able to crawl up under my nice warm covers and that I made it through the day.

It didn't really matter what I was thankful for on each day, it only mattered that I actually took time to stop and reflect on the many blessings God has given me. There were days it was easy to see my blessings and then there were days when my kids drove me crazy, work was tough, my husband was distant, and overall, I just wanted those days to hurry up and be over with. But I still searched and found things to be thankful for. During this journey, I realized how much I enjoyed counting my blessings. I realize that so many people have it so much worse than I do and I really am blessed. I don't want to stop my thanks. I don't want to stop praising Him and thanking Him for his grace that He renews with me everyday. I don't want to stop saying "Thank you Lord. I don't deserve all the things you do for me but Lord, I thank you, thank you for them."

With this in mind I have decided to continue this season of thanksgiving in my life. I have decided to dedicate every Thursday to look specifically for the small things to be thankful for. Those things that aren't always staring me in the face but those little mercies and blessings He gives to us everyday. Whether it be on Facebook or here on my blog, I have decided that Thirsday will now be called Thankful Thursdays. If you wish to join me, I would be more than thrilled. Let's shout it from the roof tops how good our God is! I am so excited about this new's time to sweat the small stuff people and start looking for those little blessings in life. Afterall, your life (and mine) is FULL of them.

Be Blessed,